'Ready or not here I come.'

How would you feel about taking a fitness class from an instructor that couldn't touch her toes, or advice about nutrition from an overweight dietitian?  Do you judge them and wish you could get your money back before you even start? Perhaps you admire them for not caring what 'everyone else' thinks? Dear Aphrodite likes to take a moment and wonder what drives them. What if the best healers really are the ones that need the most healing. 

This months blog is a personal story written by one of Aphrodisiac Male Escorts' two directors. Madam Regina presents a classic 'do as I say not as I do' story with a final twist that delves into what occurs when someone finally takes their own advice. There is something to be learned in every paragraph of this story... Dear Aphrodite presents: 

An intimate confession.

Given that I'm such a private person, I've been agonising over whether to share a very intimate part of myself. It has taken a great deal of courage to move through my fears but ultimately what tipped the scales in my decision to share, is the inner knowing that some may connect to the essence of my story. This is not easy. I'm shy about people knowing things. 

Firstly, I'm a single mum to 2 beautiful kids. I am also a business-woman, a daughter, sister, an auntie and a friend. Until earlier this year I had been celibate for the best part of a decade. Ten whole, long years. I can hear you saying "for the love of Denzel Washington...why?!" It's a great question. The answer is complex, but the main reason was to get back on my feet after a break up and to focus on raising my kids. I consciously shut off the notion of having a partner in my life. I wasn't hating on men, in fact I love them. I just didn't want to deal with having one... for the time being. 

I set out with purpose to become invisible to men.
Over time I gained weight and played myself down. I didn't notice men, and soon enough, it seemed, they stopped noticing me. This was despite the fact that I was by nature a very sexual human, at the time it felt right. 

My family and friends eventually gave up on the idea of me partnering up. I just wouldn’t hear of it. I went about life whilst working hard to heal my heart and restore balance, eventually only savouring a faint memory of past ecstasy. I have been lucky enough to experience other worldly intimacy. I knew exactly what I was missing. I had successfully tamed the wild woman in me and my for the time being rolled into years. 

About a year ago, almost 2 years into running Aphrodisiac Male Escorts, a niggling sensation awoke within me. Whist trying so hard to keep up with the responsibility of being a mum and keeping up a fulfilling yet demanding business, my contentment was slowly turning into restlessness. What once felt safe was morphing into confinement, imprisonment; I had clipped my own wings. I was running on empty. Stagnation comes to mind as I write this. 

I had lost myself. 

Hearing stories almost daily from our clients about extended periods of celibacy. A year, 2 years. 4 years, 7 years.....20 years, was a constant reminder of my own buried sense of self. I listened to their fears and uncertainties about taking a step forward, moving on, healing their heart...mending their broken wings then walked side by side with them to hear their brave stories of triumph and delight on the other side of courage. I began to feel like a fraud. I knew the ride from where I was, back to my purpose was going to be a confronting, uncertain one; and at some point felt like I had no choice. I'm sure our clients had no idea how intensely we feel their stories. Let's just say that tears have flowed more than once.

      

I couldn't live with my discomfort anymore, that dense foreboding of finding myself on the 'old' side of being a middle- aged woman. I don't have an issue with maturing. What bothered me was feeling old...that somehow, somewhere I'd lost my softness. My femininity. And as funny as it seems to say now, I felt like I was at a point of no return. The sensual womanly experiences I had so revelled in were in my distant past. Kind of in that 'If you don't use it, you lose it' style. 

Leaving the comfort zone.

I started on a path without any idea where I was heading. I still wasn't interested in a relationship or even dating for that matter. I had no intention of kissing a thousand frogs to get my needs met. The notion of online dating, weeding through profiles with no real guarantee of satisfaction was daunting to say the least. It is safe to say that I was clueless about the brave new world of dating…but I did have a good grasp on hiring a male escort...at least in theory.

I held my cards close to my chest, not sharing my thoughts with anyone not even with my childhood best friend and business partner, Anna, for fear of backing out. Over the next several months I researched other male escorts agencies and gentlemen that were working independently. This time it wasn't for a competitive edge but through the eyes and emotions of a client. 

I had a check-list of minimum requirements needing to be met so that I could feel comfortable enough to step outside my comfort zone. I required to feel safe, to be assured of confidentiality, ensure safe sex practice and to know that the escort was registered as a sex worker, for assurance of regular STI health checks. In addition, chemistry was a MUST. My demands led to disappointment. The men were either physically unappealing, some clearly didn't understand women. Some had no clue about being in the service industry and others could only be loosely referred to as ‘gentlemen’.  

Running away from home.

After months of researching, getting cold feet, feeling frustrated with myself, and then searching again, I finally decided on an independent male escort. He had that certain je ne sais quoi, his profile read well and he managed to relay his passion for women. 

I called him up for a chat and although he wasn't as polished on the phone, I pushed through and organised a 2- hour booking with him. There was no sense of excitement- it was more like "now look what you've gone and done?!" Shutting out the immense discomfort I then booked a 3 day stay in a hotel with a great balcony view of the Melbourne city skyline. My booking with, lets call him *Sam, was to take place on the last evening of my mini vacation...I hadn't had a break for 4 years... yes mamma was running away from home!

For the next 2 weeks leading up to D Day, I must have changed my mind a dozen times or so. Emotions ranged from panic to dread to excitement and back to panic. I refused to tell anyone and my internal dialogue was loud and unrelenting. Bridgette Jones had nothing on me. Every possible insecurity took it’s turn to rise to the surface. I acknowledged and ignored myself, knowing that ultimately this was my best opportunity to overcome my hiatus from whole adult life. After all I was in full control and could say 'no' at anytime…and that in the absence of chemistry, I could receive a nice massage or just simply send the male escort away.

       'The best way out is always through.' Robert Frost

It took quite a bit of manoeuvring and negotiating but I managed to organise the kids and my schedule in such a way as to avoid the world ending while I was away. I arrived at the hotel armed with scented candles, a bottle of wine, my favourite music, a book, sensual lingerie and my laptop. The room was beautiful, the view magnificent - I felt like a queen. I did not venture out of the room the entire time. I indulged in room-service and watched re-runs of Entourage. I jumped on the bed, took long long showers, napped, walked around naked and I danced. By day 2 I felt more myself than I had in a very long time. In the absence of my intense schedule and all the roles I play I still existed….how about that!?

D Day- I woke up in a panic not unlike the morning of my tandem skydive 12 years ago. Me and my brilliant ideas! "Feel the fear and do it anyway" was my mental mantra on repeat. Sam was due to arrive at 6pm. I had to keep myself occupied the entire day. Trying to read a book was pointless and so Entourage came to the rescue once again.

By 4pm I was having heart palpitations. I thought I might be having a heart attack. Inhaling; I got busy preening myself. I prepared an envelope with money for Sam and put it on the dresser. By 5.30 I was pacing. The irony was not lost on me. How many clients have we placated prior to their first booking?...Hundreds.

5.50pm I get a text from Sam that his taxi is stuck in traffic and he's running 20 minutes late. I feel sick, grateful that I only had a light lunch. More time to kill. 6.08pm my phone rings, Sam's in the lobby. I give him the room number. Wobbly knees and all, I walk to the door to meet him. 

Ready or not here I come.

I opened the door to be greeted with a warm smile, I am surprised by his overpowering presence. His photo certainly didn't do him justice. Thoughts of handing Sam the envelope and sending him away disappear. Picking up on my nerves, he took over with light conversation and accepted a glass of wine from my not-so-steady hand. I couldn’t master any level of sophistication or feign confidence. He asked me about myself. I gave him a brief overview about my celibacy, omitting the duration, and expressed that the purpose was to see if I can even attempt get back on that bike.

He took my hand and leaned in to kiss me. The rest is a blur of undulating waves of pleasure and passionate alchemy. It was intoxicating; a sensory carnival. I saw myself through Sam’s eyes and I felt beautiful. I felt sexy...and I still had it - in spades! Sam mirrored me perfectly. I ended up extending for a third hour, revelling in the feather-like touches, soft whispers, delicious kisses, breathy moans and divine injections of sublime erections. Exhaling- I am reborn. 

The erotic animation of worshipping and being worshipped is seared into my memory. 

The re-awakening - A rite of passage.

Despite being strangers, I set out to experience true intimacy and I did it. Sam seemed delightfully affected by it too. It was so liberating to take that leap across this canyon of paralysing fear and uncertainty. I can never again un-know my womanly essence. It has no expiry date. It only took me 44 years… I bloomed in secret because I guess the most beautiful things always do. 

A month later, I was still walking in suspended elation…cloud 9 and all that jazz. My skin was dewy with that indefinable afterglow. A knowing smile was a permanent fixture on my face with no sign of vacating anytime soon. I once again felt my center of gravity. I felt soft, feminine yet extraordinarily powerful. Everything looked brighter and I moved through my daily tasks with relative ease. And men noticed me once more…or was it me who noticed them?

Today, I'm writing this from my home, from the same slouchy couch where I felt so lost just a year ago.

The difference? Me, the men I've embraced and the miles I've travelled since. I truly believe that a clear purpose propelled me to move through the immense fear and confusion. I used this experience to face my seemingly insurmountable self-doubt. I wouldn't say that I'm quite whole just yet, but I have taken a quantum leap towards it. 

I feel such pride in the heart-centred service Anna and I have worked so hard to create for women to safely journey through what I now understand to be a modern day rite-of-passage.

Image Dear Aphrodite

"Please let’s not place an ignorant cultural taboo on celebrating sexiness in all it’s forms and please let’s broaden our appreciation for all that we men and women are. Let’s become fascinated with each other, immersing ourselves deeply in all our qualities, mutual and diverse. When we do this, we WE OURSELVES open up our excitements and fascinations, the covers of all the magazines will change and the occasional wolf-whistle in the street might even be welcomed."
-Jamie Catto

***

The team at Aphrodisiac male escorts have been working their butts off updating our website. Please check it out. We’d love your feedback. 

Keep update between blogs on our  Tumblr and facebook pages.

Dear Aphrodite - For the wild woman at heart.

Passions of Aphrodite – Fan Page, not linked to the business. Safe to share amongst your friends. 

Did Regina's story move you? Let her know how you feel. Use the comments below or send an email to info@sageforwomen.com 

Aphrodisiac ME

Single doesn't have to mean celibate.

There are so many reasons women choose celibacy. For some it is a choice they find empowering and liberating. Others don't have the time to seek meaningful or casual relationships. It's a safe form of preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Some women choose celibacy because they have been hurt, suffered a loss or aren't ready to share their body and emotions. It's fair to say for many celibacy is not a choice, whether she craves sex or intimacy, there is often a lack of suitable partners.

Many of the new clients at Aphrodisiac Male Escorts have been celibate for extended periods of time, not just months, but years or decades. This may come as no surprise. The fact that many of them soon move on to form meaningful relationships is a pleasant phenomena that begs the question.  What makes a sexually active woman more attractive?

Dear Aphrodite thinks it might have something to do with the smile she can't wipe off her face.  It also has a lot do with endorphins and hormones.  Oestrogen is a hormone that makes our skin soft and our hair shiny, levels double when a woman has sex.

Oestrogen protects the heart and reduces the risk of Alzheimer's and Osteoporosis. Endorphins reduce pain and stress, and improve sleep and menstrual cycles. Then there are the 10 health benefits of having an orgasm described in this article at Flo Living.

It's not just about the way a woman looks, healthy is sexy. Having sex improves our senses, we hear better and smell better, it increases brain activity, which makes us smarter too.

Our confidence and self esteem are boosted.  Subtle energy shifts help us move better, dress better. This, of course, also depends on the quality of the sex.  Anything less than having our desires met, is at best frustrating. Sometimes it's not even about having sex but owning our sexuality, our femininity.

Getting your horny back.

When was the last time you had good sex, any sex?  Dr Shannon Chavez, integrates both physical and psychological methods to help women become sexually empowered. Her recent article answers the question I feel no desire or arousal what can I do to get my horniness back?  She tells us 'not to wait for desire to magically appear. Watching a movie, reading erotica or listening to sexy music... can lead to sex.' Aphrodisiac Me's tumblr page is full of arousing images.

s3xylicious

Raunchy or relaxed, slow is a good place to start. A romantic dinner, a dance class or drinks to begin. Perhaps a long kiss, tantra massage and an in depth Yoni massage will get the mood going. A favourite fantasy, or just some much needed training.  If you want it and you haven't got it, where can you go to get it - for the first time, regularly or every time?

Dear Aphrodite would like to introduce our featured companion for the month, André. He knows how to slow down. A trained and absolute master.  He holds the keys to the secret desires of many women. Log into the Aphrodisiac ME  page, and click on the companions tab to hear his audio tape. Read about his abilities to free a woman's inhibitions, clear her mind and tap into her unique sexual expression.

This month André is featured in an article by ManTalk magazine. In the article The business of pleasure he discusses everything from being an escort, the facts and the myths, experiences with his clients as well as what it means to be a Sex Surrogate. He is eloquent, intelligent and it is obvious that he knows more about the anatomy of women, inside and out, than most women know themselves.

Dear Aphrodite's movie of the month is a TED talk that made us cry, laugh and rejoice. Sheila Kelley explains the importance, and beauty, of unleashing feminine sexuality. Let's get naked - goes for 21 minutes, but you'll want to watch it again. Share it if it touches you.  It's not for everybody. Some people are asexual.  If you are woman that feels like you are missing out on something this video is for you.





We are far more complicated than men are sexually, the focus isn't just the genitals. Focusing on any one area can bring enormous pleasure. The average couple spends 15 minutes having sex but it can take a women 45 minutes just to get turned on.

Even if it's one night only, when you connect with someone else, new possibilities open up. A simple gesture or eye contact can open your heart. Physical touch - can open your entire being. Aphrodisiac ME takes care of the details, whether it's social or intimate you can just enjoy yourself. While it may not be good for repeat business, helping women open up to love again, or just healing part of their past pain is worth it.  If it can work for one it can work for many.

People have pre-conceived ideas about what the sex industry is all about. Dear Aphrodite is part of a worldwide movement to turn the focus back to honouring women.  Whether she is in gumboots or stilettos she defines womanhood.

There is a broad range of women who have used the services of Aphrodisiac Male Escorts. They differ in age, shape, backgrounds, marital status and professions but they all had to make that first phone call or email enquiry.  Each enquiry is treated individually in a non-committal, non judgemental and guaranteed private environment.

Dear Aphrodite's quote of the month is by Alan Moore (25,000 years of erotic freedom.)

Are you ready to be progressive? Do you want to meet André or one of the other companions? Zac and Raul are based in Sydney, you can check out their profiles on the website too. No matter where you are, our companions are prepared to travel, Australia wide and abroad. 

If you are tempted but not sure it's the right time for you, it's possible to meet a companion without any obligation to follow through with an appointment. First Impressions offer women an opportunity to meet up and decide if they like what they see. If after 10 minutes you change your mind he will leave, if you like what you see, you decide what comes next.

It's time to get your sexy back,turn on that part of feminine energy that so easily gets turned off. Every woman, at any age can be in touch with her primal energies, not just the youthful fashionistas plastered all over our media. In Brianna Weist's post, confidence tops the list of 14 of the most powerfully hot qualities people can have. Are you feeling confident?

Next month Dear Aphrodite discusses why it's so hard for women to talk about sex, and explore if this has anything to do with the 'Matilda vs Matthew effect.' Why do women bring each other down, instead of respecting each other's paths and honouring each others individuality?  Dear Aphrodite has taken the grown woman's oath. Will you?  

Want to keep up to date with what's arousing Dear Aphrodite between posts.  Click on the links and join our Facebook pages.

Dear Aphrodite  - Business page - Facebook's rules are our only boundaries.

Ode to Aphrodite. - Fan Page - you won't be afraid to share these posts with your friends.

Passions of Aphrodite. - Fan page - not linked to the business, designed for the wild woman at heart.